Lisa Adams Resources: Prickly Pronouns

Prickly Pronouns

Chapter Two: The Pronoun Problem

Take a look at the following sentences. Chances are, you hear and read sentences like these every day:

I feel the sorrow between you and I.

This is her.

The gift was intended for Regis and I.

These sentences are incorrect. Why? Because subject pronouns are being used for object pronouns, and vice versa.

Mom's Advice

How did this crazy trend start? I think it all goes back to Mom...

Kid: Sam and me are going to play.
Mom: Sam and I.
Kid (rolling eyes): Okay, Sam and I are going to play.

But in spite of our rolled eyes, we've absorbed Mom's instructions. And we've absorbed them so completely that we think "Sam and me" is never correct.

Well, that's just not true. Using "Sam and I" would be correct in some situations, and using "Sam and me" would be correct in other situations. Because "I" is a subject pronoun, "Sam and I" must serve as a subject. And because "me" is an object pronoun, "Sam and me" must serve as an object.

Examples:

Sam and I are going to play.

("Sam and I" is the subject.)

My little brother wants to play with Sam and me.

("Sam and me" is the object of "with.")

To be nice, Sam and I brought him along.

("Sam and I" is the subject.)

Then he beat Sam and me in the race.

("Sam and me" is the object of "beat.")

Some more examples:

No: Him and the cat are best friends.
Yes: He and the cat are best friends.

No: They gave their feedback to he and I.
Yes: They gave their feedback to him and me.

No: You and me used to be together.
Yes: You and I used to be together.

No: That's for Brett and I!
Yes: That's for Brett and me!

No: He's going to lose Tina and I.
Yes: He's going to lose Tina and me.

No: Her and Luigi are class clowns.
Yes: She and Luigi are class clowns.

No: The department sent the checks to he and I.
Yes: The department sent the checks to him and me.

No: If it weren't for Maribel and I, this place would be a wreck.
Yes: If it weren't for Maribel and me, this place would be a wreck.

No: Troy ran right past Shannon and I.
Yes: Troy ran right past Shannon and me.

Keep in mind that a subject pronoun CANNOT follow a preposition. Here are some common prepositions that are often used incorrectly.

Never, Ever Correct

between [anything] and I
to [anything] and I
for [anything] and I
with [anything] and I
beside [anything] and I
about [anything] and I
according to [anything] and I
regarding [anything] and I
since [anything] and I
unlike [anything] and I
of [anything] and I
like [anything] and I
from [anything] and I
except for[anything] and I
in addition to [anything] and I
instead of [anything] and I
because of [anything] and I
on [anything] and I

There are other prepositions. If you're not sure whether a word is a preposition, the dictionary will help you!

Memory Tricks

Using the right pronoun these days is especially tricky, because our ears have become accustomed to incorrect usage. "Between you and I" sounds right, because so many people use it (heck, just turn on the radio—you'll hear it in minutes!). But no matter how widespread the mistake, you must still use correct pronouns in professional, scholarly, and all formal writing.

Luckily there are a few memory tricks that will help you choose correctly.

Memory Trick #1

First consider this line:

The rajah loves Anjuli and (I, me).

To figure out which pronoun belongs, remove the parts of the sentence that are getting in the way:

The rajah loves (I, me).

Now it should be easy to tell which pronoun belongs: me.

Therefore the correct form is:

The rajah loves Anjuli and me.

Memory Trick #2

The second trick also requires replacement. First, look at the line:

Keep this between (he, him) and (I, me).

Next, remove the pronouns:

Keep this between ______.

Now ask yourself whether you would use "we" or "us" in that spot.

Keep this between we
Keep this between us

Clearly the second sentence is the right one. But how does that help? Well, "we" is a subject pronoun and "us" is an object pronoun. When you figure out which one works, you know whether you should choose subject or object pronouns. If "we" sounds right, that means you need to use "he and I" (subject pronouns). But if "us" sounds right, you need to use "him and me" (object pronouns). In this case, the line should really read:

Keep this between him and me.

Remember, both pronouns must be either subject pronouns or object pronouns—don't mix and match!

Let's try another one:

No matter what happens, (she, her) and (I, me) will stay together.

Now remove the pronoun part:

No matter what happens, ___________ will stay together.

Now substitute "we" and "us":

No matter what happens, we will stay together.
No matter what happens, us will stay together.

You know the answer. The first sentence is correct. Therefore the sentence should read:

No matter what happens, she and I will stay together.

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